“What is God calling me to do?” If I had a nickel for every time I asked myself that question I would have that vacation home I’ve dreamed about for so long. For many years I questioned whether or not something was wrong with me because, unlike so many around me, I felt no calling on my life. I felt as if I were drifting through life, working to pay the bills, feeling angry that I couldn’t find my passion, my calling. Many nights were spent in tearful prayer, begging God to reveal a plan for my life. I kept thinking, “There has to be more to life than this.” I couldn’t escape the feeling that God created me for something greater than just aimless living, that surely I had a purpose.
I can’t tell you that I have answered this question of “what God is calling me to do.” If you google this question you will find many who have attempted to answer this, and many more who are seeking answers. So many of us want an easy answer, we want to see it in black and white – a billboard on our highway of life, “Mikel, you should ______ – Love, God.” If only.
It’s not that easy, however, there is beauty in that. There is much to be learned in the journey, whatever that journey looks like. By not limiting my identity or purpose to one thing, my “calling” if you will, I have been able to live a myriad of experiences. I have learned so much about myself. I have discovered I am stronger than I ever believed I could be. I have learned to depend on other people more than makes me comfortable. I have learned to expect the unexpected and to never get so comfortable that I become complacent. I have learned to stop comparing my callings to other people and I have learned that even those who think they have life figured out, are just as lost as the rest of us.
The danger in trying to answer the question of “what is God calling me to” is that we often forget the live the life that we were given. We forget that God is speaking to us in the quiet, in the chaos, in the mess, in the emptiness. We can forget that we have an opportunity to live our best lives where ever we are. We can get so caught up in the searching we don’t realize that we are already at our destination, and that our destination can change as we change.
We tend to make things more complicated than they are. I’m as guilty as anyone. However, I have learned to find peace in my uncertainty in knowing that there are really only three things we need to worry about: Love God, Love others, Love yourself. If we can manage that, even to a degree, the rest will fall into place. Enjoy the journey.
Mikel is the woman behind Zach’s beard. She made from peppermint mocha, Christmas cheer, and adventure. Mikel lives in North West Montana with her wonderful husband and kids. She loves a good adventure and being in the mountains. (Don’t tell anyone but I’m pretty sure she’s Wonder Woman!)
Bearded Theologians 